What will be your last words? What will be your last meal?

Ondina Silvera

The Ugly Side of Suicide


To assume someone who takes their own life, killed themselves because they were depressed or mainly struggling with their mental stability is to believe that this person also didn’t or is incapable of experiencing guilt, shame, or defeat.

These are plausible reasons a person would also want to take their own life. Suicide isn’t only reserved for people who struggle with seeing the value and worth of their existence. It isn’t just reserved for people who are tired of being physical, mentally, spiritually, sexually, and verbally abused.

People who experience guilt, shame and defeat also entertain the thought of taking their own life, because to live in a mental prison is equivalent to being incarcerated in solitary confinement. You are always running from yourself and the idea that your guilt, shame, and defeat may destroy the very thing that made people admire, love and rely on you.

“I want to kill myself.” “I am tired of this life….” I know a few people who have felt like this and have said these same exact words.


Many times, people who are “ending it all,” do not want to kill themselves. However, at times these individuals may experience an overwhelming that may cause them to have a desperate need to stop the pain they are experiencing. 

The shame they feel, the guilt they are tired of carrying, heck they just might want to put it DOWN…want to “hang it up.”

I always felt that a person who hangs themselves are really in a lot of pain, and very disconnected with life physically and spiritually.

This life we are living, it has been said it is a spiritual one, and we are experiencing spiritual warfare, and when these incidents occur, I cannot help but see the accuracy in that statement. In Matthew 27, Judas after realizing he put his foot to cause the death of Jesus, he hung himself…for shame and guilt was too much to live with. Matthew 27: 3-5

Our minds are strong yet fragile, and we have to be aware of our needs. We have to be okay with accepting we are spiritual beings. I believe once we have received this, it will allow us to forgive ourselves for not being “perfect” and it will allow us to understand our decisions have grave consequences at times. We cannot take on the Spiritual parts of our beings without the right support. I always say you need Jesus and Medication, because with the two together, it is a vital situation. So many times people forget they too need to put ABS on their mind as much as they do on their bodies.

Anthony Bourdain isn’t the first person to take their own life and sadly there will be others because people underestimate the power and fragility of the mind. People are challenged with guarding their minds against the very same people they call family, friend and or loved ones. We are challenged with removing the parasites in our lives, we are struggling with walking away from toxic environments that will cause us to turn on those who love us and also abuse ourselves.

Let’s take the stigma out of getting help, let’s remove the notion of people who we assume “have it all” should not complain or have issues or problems. We are all in need of Gods healing hands, and if you do not believe in God, we are all in need of love and the kind of love that will be honest and protect someone's dignity.









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